A Million Moons for the Lost Girl
by glimmerveins
Summary: People thought that she was the girl that shone as pure as a million moons, but they're wrong. She's broken, just as broken as the rest of them — a figment of a star that's masked by the night.


In the moonlight, she shines the brightest, but, in the day, she fades away.

Her hands, they're covered in dirt. Her knees, they're covered in dirt. She feels her father's hand encased at her waist, pulling her back. She hears his voice in her ear, soothing, telling her it would be okay. Luna Lovegood has always taken her father's word as god, but, this time, she knows he is wrong. Things will never be okay.

Her fingers are curled into claws as she sinks them into the earth. April showers had turned the ground soft, and she could feel the dirt crumble beneath her hands. Even though her new dress, the one her mom had bought for her a week ago, had turned from white to brown, Luna didn't budge from her position on the ground. Nothing could get her to move.

Her vision is blurred, hot tears threatening to burst from her corners. She breathes in and out, rough jagged breaths that don't make her feel any better. She digs, deeper and deeper. Maybe if she digs far down enough her mom will come back. Maybe if she digs fast enough, she will disappear also.

Her father yanks her from the ground. The sole of Luna's leather shoe hits the white marble causing dirt to spray everywhere. It flies into her eyes, her hair, her mouth. She doesn't cry out. Things will never be okay. Not anymore. Not ever.

Abellona was the sun to Luna's moon. Everyone knows that without the sun even the moon will no longer shine.

-(l)-

She hugs her father good-bye, sinking into his familiarity. After her mother's death, neither had ever been the same. Xenophilius had always been crazy, but, without his wife, his last ties to sanity had snapped. His blue eyes, the same blue eyes once described as soulful, were covered in a glassy sheen. He was a man lost in the past, a man who was so caught up in his own memories that he had forgotten how to live.

She watches as her belongings disappear. She knows how they laugh at her glasses and her butterbeer cork necklaces. She can hear them when they call her 'Loony Luna'. Most of all, she hears the whispers in the walls, ostracizing her in the place where she expected herself to fit in. Sometimes, though, in the middle of night on the top of the astronomy tower, Luna watches the night sky. In the moment, silence hangs in the air and the world stands still for a minute. There, under the stars and the moon while the rest of the world slept, she shines.

Luna had always felt like she was missing a piece of herself, a piece she could never find. Until one day, she found it, along with her missing shoes and a shiny coin.

-(l)-

They don't laugh at her. They don't jeer at her. She feels like she's finally come home. Among the enchantment and the turmoil, Luna slowly pieces together the parts of her she once thought she could never put back together.

At first, they're jagged and sharp, unwilling to return. They scratch against her skin, whispering her doubts. She's too used to being like the moon, always keeping a part of herself hidden. It's a methodical process as she discovers where she had kept parts of herself hidden. That room, filled with familiar faces, becomes her hospital room. Slowly, Luna Lovegood stitches herself back together until she is radiant.

-(l)-

They are coming for her. She can hear them. She can feel them. She's known that this was going to come. Luna Lovegood is not afraid anymore. No, she's stronger than that. When they come, they will not be taking any vital part of her.

She sees the crack of color. It flies across the dim room, the sole backdrop of lighting when everything else is black. How could something so beautiful be so terrible? She feels the impact, it crushes against her ribs, emptying her body of all strength. The color fades against her, turning an inky black as it oozed into her.

The pain radiates through every fiber of her being. As hard as she tries, she cannot gasp for air. Her hands, they are shaking. She wants to scream; she wants to scream until her voice gives out, but she won't. Luna Lovegood will not give them the pleasure of watching her unfold. Instead, her body crumples to the ground as her fingers clench in tight fists. The pain will not conquer her. She will conquer the pain.

Even when they escape, she can still feel remnants of the pain, but it doesn't bother her. The darker the night is, the brighter the moon shines.

-(l)-

She can see his robes, the canary yellow contrasts against the grey rubble.

Again, Luna finds herself on the ground. Her knees are scraped. Her fingernails are bloodied. A wound on her head makes her world feel dizzy, but there she kneels. She had seen it. She was supposed to be the one on the ground, not him. He had wanted to redeem himself, to fill the father role he had failed at before.

"No, please. Daddy. Wake up," she shakes him desperately, hoping that he would wake up. Nothing. There is only her in the deserted hallway. For the first time, Luna Lovegood can hear the deafening silence.

Until, the silence is broken by screaming. The pain has gotten to her. The stitched together girl comes undone again.

-(l)-

She can't sleep. She can't eat. Luna Lovegood finds herself becoming swallowed by the darkness. Her world was once defined by the Wracklespurts and Nargles that she saw everywhere. Now, all she can see is a grim world painted with a grisly sheen. There are no creatures here, only demons.

Her friends, they don't understand. She refuses to speak to anyone. Even if she wanted to, her throat has swelled up into a hard lump. Luna watches from her bed in St. Mungo's as everyone else slowly picks themselves and rebuilds their life. She tries too. She tries to get up and see the world the way she used to. She tries her glasses on again, to see if the magic is still present. There's no use though. Even with the aid of her faithful glasses, everything is blank.

Slowly, she sees her friends come in with hidden smiles full of love. They visit her, every once in a while, but not as frequently as they once did. Most of the days, it's just her and the silence. She's not bitter; being bitter requires more strength than she has. They would move on, all of them, and she'd be the one stuck in limbo, alive but not living.

-(l)-

One night, it all changes. Moonlight basks the ground as she navigates her way through the hallway.

"Hello, miss." a figure approaches from the shadow, and Luna instinctively reaches for her side pocket even though she hasn't been in possession of a wand for over five years. "Could you direct me to the loo? I'm terribly lost."

The light from the window illuminate the scars across his cheek. Luna points down the hallway that she had come down.

"Thank you," he says, extending his hand. "I'm Rolf Scamander, by the way."

She reaches out her hand, feeling his callused fingers against her skin. "I'm Luna," her voice is hoarse, "Luna Lovegood."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Luna." he smiles, his eyes crinkle like tissue paper. After he walks away, Luna swears that she sees a Nargle floating in the doorway.

* * *

Author's Note:

I hope you all enjoyed my characterization of Luna. She has always been one of my favorite characters. What inspired me to write this fanfic actually came from Lily Luna. We know that Harry and Ginny named the rest of their children after people who were dear and had lost their lives in the war. This made curious as to what happened to Luna between the end of the war and her meeting of Rolf/ having children/ etc. Anyways, that's just my confused rambling. Hope you liked it!

As always, please review!


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